Colbert & Nick on Boats

 

THANK YOU FOR BEING HERE AND THANK YOU FOR ENOUGHING UP YOUR BEARD BEFORE COMING OUT. YOU HAVE A NICE SORT OF WEDGE GOING ON IN YOUR FACE. >> I AM HOPING WOULD CAST ME AS A VIKING ONE OF THESE DAYS. >> Stephen: OH, YOU WOULD MAKE A GREAT VIKING. >> HAVE YOU STUDIED MUCH OF THE SCANDINAVIANS PEOPLE. >> A BIT, I AM FASCINATED WITH THE VIKING FUNERAL. >> Stephen: OH, YES. >> WOULD YOU LIKE TO BE SET ON FIRE IN A BOAT WHEN YOU DIE. >> I WOULD. >> Stephen: A BOAT YOU BUILT, I IMAGINE. THAT’S RIGHT. MY FRIEND CHRIS PRATT HAS BEEN CONTRACTED TO SHOOT A FLAMING ARROW TO LIGHT THE FUNERAL BOAT ON FIRE.

HE. >> Stephen: IT IS A BEAUTIFUL BOAT THAT YOU BUILT, ACTUALLY. THIS IS A CANOE. >> YES. [ APPLAUSE ] >> THAT’S MY SECOND. IT IS CALLED LUCKY BOY, MADE FOR MY FRIEND JIMMY. >> Stephen: JIMMY IS A LUCKY MAN. >> HE IS. >> Stephen: I WAS SO JEALOUS OF — I AM SO IMPRESSED REALLY OF YOUR WOODWORK I SENT YOU A PICTURE OF A BOAT THAT I MADE TO TRY TO IMPRESS YOU. NOW WHY DID MINE GET LAUGHED AT? WHAT DO YOU THINK OF MY BOAT? >> IT IS BEAUTIFUL. YES. >> I MEAN, IT IS NOT A WORK OF ART LIKE THAT IS, BUT I DON’T THINK IT GARNERS LAUGHTER. >> NO.

>> I WOULD LIKE TO SEE ALL OF YOUR BOATS THAT ARE LAUGHING SO HARTLEY. >> Stephen: EXACTLY, EXACTLY. YOU AND I HAVE BONDING RIGHT NOW. I AM BONDING TO YOU BECAUSE I FEEL VERY ATTACKED. >> WELL, THAT’S THE NICE THING ABOUT A BOAT IS WE CAN PADDLE AWAY FROM ALL OF THESE SONS OF BITCHES.